What Does It Feel Like to Overdose on Fentanyl?

Tragedy struck me in 2005 on December 18th when my wife overdosed on Fentanyl. We had just finished decorating our Christmas tree and went to bed, but she never woke up. Fentanyl is a powerful drug that kills, and this experience has deeply affected me. Despite the dark memories, my story and insights may offer a glimpse into the impact of fentanyl overdose and its personal and emotional consequences.

Personal Experiences with Fentanyl

I have myself used fentanyl for chronic pain. It comes in various forms, and the largest dose available is used with patches. Accidentally heating a fentanyl patch can result in an overdose, which feels like wearing thick socks and experiencing a slight body heat. However, I usually feel no significant discomfort from these patches. Occasionally, I have heated a patch, a moment that briefly causes distress and sickness. One day, while driving, I felt an unfamiliar sensation. I felt like my body was in two places at once, causing instant panic about a potential overdose. Removing the patch was my immediate response.

Overdose Incidents

Unfortunately, severe overdose incidents have occurred more than a few times in my life. Each time, it happens so suddenly that you barely realize it is happening. You simply black out instantly. Here are two such instances:

First Overdose Incident

On one occasion, I snorted a bag of the drug. Fortunately, the Narcan response kicked in, and I was hospitalized. The Narcan is given through an IV drip, and even with one bag, the recovery process is rapid.

I was living in a rough part of town and had left the motel room door open. At 2:00 a.m., a neighbor, a pimp, came out to take out the trash. He found me on the floor, face and lips blue. The main girl at the place provided CPR until the ambulance arrived. I am eternally grateful to her, especially as it was my son's birthday. That night, the authorities setup a crime scene in my room, which was understandable given the circumstances.

Second Overdose Incident

About a month later, I overdosed again. This time, I waited on the street for my ex-partner to pick up our son, who I was not allowed to see. We went to McDonald's together, though I don’t recall it, and then proceeded to Wawa for gas, where my ex-partner punched me to wake me up. The police were called, but they didn’t catch up to us. However, I had to call the next day, and my son couldn’t handle it anymore. My ex-partner then drove me to my girlfriend, who then drove me to the hospital. A man named Scott provided Narcan, and I went through CPR. I awoke in the middle of the night and was discharged the next day, but not without serious treatment.

Living with the Aftermath

These experiences have left me with a deep understanding of the risks and the aftermath of an overdose. It is a deeply relaxed state of not being aware that you are probably going to die, and it is not a way to go. If you are considering suicide or fentanyl use, it is essential to seek help and avoid such situations.

Conclusion

For those who may have lost a loved one to fentanyl overdose, know that they were likely unaware and that it wasn’t meant to be. Trust me from a personal standpoint. The pain of losing a loved one is unimaginable, but it’s also important to remember that everyone’s intentions are not malevolent. If you need to talk or message, I am here to offer support.

Keywords: fentanyl overdose, personal experience, fentanyl side effects